Today is the day . . .

Today, I realize more of what Paul was talking about when he said that he wanted to do good but missing that mark was always with him, most especially while he found himself clothed in flesh.

http://biblehub.com/bsb/romans/7.htm

In his letter to the Romans Paul said:  We know that the Law is spiritual, but I am unspiritual, sold as a slave to sin.

I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do, I do not do. But what I hate, I do. And if I do what I do not desire, I admit that the Law is good. In that case, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.

I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my flesh; for I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.   For I do not do the good I want to do. Instead, I keep on doing the evil I do not want to do.  And if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.

So this is the principle I have discovered: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in God’s Law.  But I see another law at work in my body, warring against the law of my mind and holding me captive to the law of sin that dwells within me. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God, through Jesus Christ our Lord!


Today,

I know who I am
 I am who I know,
and now is the time,
my time is now to forgive
to know no man after the flesh

  Released

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Colorful-Swirling-Vortex-8 Longings of My Heart

Colorful-Swirling-Vortex-8

                                                  
I long to be clothed in Spirit and in Truth
this is my desire
knowing I am that
I am at one for life
true life within, and indivisible
perceiving no separation

Shining true light  darkness is no more

My heart burns within me like liquid golden light,
burning in the furnace
Rivers of living water calm and cool me, temper me

Reshape – Reform
Refine
To make a good wife
a loving friend
To give to receive
a laugh a day
One day
Time and Space
With grace, mercy and righteous judgment
Today
To sit in stillness and hear myself say:
Children
Hear and understand
The LORD our God
the LORD is ONE
Love the L
ord with
One Heart
One Soul
One Strength
One MIND
and as you Love Yourself
that very same way
Love your neighbor for
It is finished
It is complete
the Kingdom of God
is
WITHIN

BIG LOVE
lil gini


Imagine

When is the last time you used your imagination?

Just imagine, try it. smell it, taste it, feel it,
taste a lemon or chocolate.

See yourself taking a nice bath or shower.
Imagine your best friend and just hanging out with them . . .

How’d that make you feel?

JESUS –
Jesus, people were either praising Jesus or trying to kill Jesus, they still are, every day.

It is written:
For this reason, therefore, the Jews were seeking all the more to kill Him, because He not only was breaking the Sabbath but also was calling God His own Father, making Himself equal with God. John 5 – 18:18

Are we not the very same with one another? Are we not the very same within our own selves? Imagine being equal with God. How would you use such a power? To what end? How would you walk? talk? and conduct yourself toward your fellow man?fear-not-for-i-am-with-you-be-not-dismayed-for-i-amd-your-god-i-will-strengthen-you-yes-i-will-help-you

THE BATTLE
This I have in the past learned the hard way.

My heart has been aching for years and years now. Finally, I am on the mend, truly I am.

All too literally, I have put my heart in another man’s hands. I’ve had enough heart surgery on the outside for three people at least. Now, it’s time for surgery on the inside. My chest has been sawed in two and wired back together, heart has been stopped and started, it’s arteries blockages have been spliced, and rearranged to assist with the flow of life.

This I have learned the hard way. Our weapons for winning the war on fear and doubt are within us. Everything we need is within. Christ the hope of glory is within you! Christ in you is so close that you can not nor will you ever be separate.

Watch what conversations, judgments, loving and unloving thoughts you dwell on.
Take time to think about what you are thinking about.

Hmmmm, What are you thinking about when you are not thinking about what you think about? ? ?

Truly God is One and All in All – Love and wisdom, faith, grace, and truth, forgiveness and all good things or doubt and fear, pride and greed, it is all inside of you, every last jot and tittle. We are held accountable for every imagination of our hearts. The most power, the greatest responsibility we will ever have is the power to choose. Choose wisely, choose nobly, choose lovingly.

Like tiny seeds, your inward imaginations are the seeds and fruit of your heart and they will yield fruit after their own kind. Reaping a harvest of what you have sown in the garden of your mind. We all reap what we sow, it is the law of an identical harvest, and that law will never pass away. Look within and monitor your thoughts and inner conversations. Speak to one another in psalms and hymns and songs making melody in your heart to the LORD, to whom you belong. Be thankful.

Change the inside, and you will witness that change on the outside.

But . . . you knew that. Be encouraged in the knowledge that “God” is for you and not against you. All good things are given richly to be enjoyed.

BIG LOVE,
lil’ gini

An Open Letter

Soundtrack (listening to):

Lisa Lobe – Stay
A. Morrisette – Ironic
4 non-blondes – What’s up?
Criminal
Nelly Furtado –  I’m Like a Bird

The following is an open letter and a personal letter to my loved ones, friends, both past present, and future.

There is so very much I would like to say that this could be a Tolstoy novel. You know, War and Peace?  I will try my best to condense what is currently in my heart.

Every person born into this world is filled with both good and evil, love and hate, right and wrong on the inside all who have reached the age of accountability are aware of this.

Blame never solves anything, oh, it may make us feel better for the moment but ultimately it doesn’t help anything. Forgiveness, and personal responsibility followed by choice, and action do make for change.  I know this, and I am doing my best to put it into practice.

Inside there is everything we need to be complete, yet on the outside, we can only work with what we have at hand and imagine for the better.

That being said, I am truly sorrowful today. I hate to be in and to see you in misery.  I am sorry. My heart and head hurt, because I hurt you, even if it was unintentional. I never want to hurt another. You are precious and I’d give you the world were it mine.

I would like you to understand that It is never my intention to hurt, insult, belittle or take advantage of you. I mean no harm. I do give all, I am open to you and here for you with all that is within me. What I can not do is choose for you.  Choice, even down to every thought we think is ours alone to make. My sky is torn today, my heart aches. I am truly sorry for your pain and anger. I care deeply. If I could give you only and all the goodness and graceful thoughts that exist I would certainly do so. With gladness, I would hold you in safe keeping for eternity.

How? tell me please, how do I show my appreciations for you allowing me to be a part of your life? How can I communicate to you that I love you? I care and will do anything for you, I  give to you all that I am without expecting anything in return if you would only ask (A. ask, S. seek, K. knock).  All you need to do is ask. I am grateful, though I may/can not know how to show it to you. It is up to you to show me how I can do that. All you need to do is ask.

If I complain about, take advantage of, or inconvenience you please forgive me.  I am still human and struggle with all of the same feelings and thoughts that every person alive on this earth does. I am doing the best I can given what I have at hand, whether or not anyone acknowledges it, or thinks otherwise. If it is your desire, I would go dirty, cold and hungry before I use you unjustly.  Believe that you may call on me anytime and with all I have and all I am I will comfort you, I will give all for you. I am dignified. I am humbled by you. I am all that I am and I would give all for you if you ask me to.

Need clarity of intention? Ask
Need money? Ask
Need companionship? Ask
Need wisdom? Ask
Need Truth? Need an ear, arm, shoulder?
Wake me up anytime, day or night and I will sit with you. I will not leave you alone unless; unless that is your desire.

All I have is yours if you will seek me out.  If I don’t have the thing, the wisdom or the answer you are looking for I will help in your search the best way I know how.

It is ALL up to you. Choose as you will.  Choose to be angry? you are allowed to be angry. Go for it. Choose to be disheartened, or wholehearted, choose hate, choose murder if you so desire, go ahead and cut me off, kill me. Although, I pray that you will choose life, and love, mercy and grace, peace and truth, but whatever your choice I will not condemn you and I will not abandon you, for you have had enough of that and you do enough of that for yourself.

I give myself to you. Everything I have is yours all you need to do is ask.

This ONE thing I ask of you. Please,  if you can find it in your heart forgive. Forgive me, forgive yourself, and know that I AM for you. I am not against you. If I could choose friendship, loyalty, laughter, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, understanding, riches, fame goodness, truth and every good thing for you I most certainly would, and do.
But those choices are not mine to make for you, I can not be responsible for your thoughts, feelings, or actions.Only you and I can make that choice.

Every waking moment, until the time we are taken from this earth we choose.

I am aware, I am here. You matter to me and I love you.

BIG LOVE
lil’ gini

PS- the impetus for this post was most disturbing, and painful for me personally, no buts about it, it’s all true.
PSS – I’m still searching for a good proofreader. Want to help?